


Smile

by jynx



Series: Bonded [4]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Jealousy, M/M, Schmoop, aborted sex, fili really doesn't like feeling insecure, kili doesn't like formalities, smacking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-28
Updated: 2013-03-28
Packaged: 2017-12-06 18:49:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/738949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jynx/pseuds/jynx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fili and Kili work through the aftermath of Mirkwood and there is a ceremony.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Smile

“You going to come to bed anytime soon?” Kili asked from the doorway.

Fili looked up from the paperwork and nodded. “Yeah, sorry. We’re still trying to figure out what to do with everyone pouring in. The mines are still all damaged but Bofur’s dealing with that and...there’s just a lot going on right now, Kili.”

Kili fingered one of his braids as he watched Fili and sighed. “All right.”

“I’ll be along in a few,” Fili said.

“Sure you will,” Kili said softly before leaving.

Fili let the papers fall to the table and rubbed his forehead. It had been three months since the battle, Thorin’s death, the coronation, everything. Three months of awkwardness between them. They had yet to have the bonding ceremony on Balin’s suggestion that they work things out first. No one honestly thought their pairing would be rejected, but there was still too much hurt. They needed to work through what had happened in Mirkwood before they bonded and, if it held to the legends like Thorin had thought, work through any feelings that might be left over before they got blindsided by each other. Fili probably wasn’t helping things but he didn’t know how to talk to Kili anymore. 

He needed to learn to talk to his brother again.

Fili got to his feet and made his way to the bedroom. Kili had already climbed into bed, dousing all but two candles for Fili to find his way around the room, and for all appearances was fast asleep. Fili sighed and sat down on the bed.

“I don’t know how to talk to you anymore,” he said into the dark. “You’re you and I’m me and I love you and that hasn’t changed, but everything else has. I just...I don’t know who we are anymore and it’s unnerving. I don’t. I don’t know.”

“Were you lying to Thorin before?” Kili asked.

“No,” Fili said, lying down next to Kili. “I want to make this work. You’re everything. I just. It’s hard.”

Kili rolled over and wrapped an arm around Fili’s waist. “All right, it’s hard. It’s awkward. Neither of us know what to do anymore and we need to fix that. Tell me what you need from me, Fee. I’ll do whatever you need.”

Fili pulled Kili closer, burying his nose in Kili’s hair. “I don’t know.”

“Do you need to punish me?” Kili asked hesitantly. “Like before?”

Fili chuckled, smiling a little. “We both know that was just a game. Too much has happened for games now.”

“I think we need our games more than ever,” Kili said. “Maybe not the same type of games, but...I liked it. You letting me do whatever it was I needed or wanted and then bringing me back to you with a stern hand and a smile. It was power, really, the two of us giving and taking and it worked.”

“You liked making me jealous.”

“I don’t want you jealous,” Kili said as he pulled away to look at Fili in the flickering candle light. “I want you to know you’re loved, to love you, to be with you no matter what. I was being childish, liking you claiming me for all to see. We--I can’t do that anymore. We have Erebor, and all those people... They need us to have our acts together. They know we’re bonded, that we’re each other’s One. That’s a good thing to a lot of them.”

“I can’t just forget what happened,” Fili said. He reached out, brushing Kili’s hair out of his face. “You looked at her... I’ve never seen you look at me like that.”

Kili closed his eyes, leaning into Fili’s touch. “I don’t know how many more times I can tell you that it didn’t mean anything. I didn’t even know what was going on. It felt like I wasn’t even in control.”

Fili leaned in and kissed Kili gently. “I don’t know how to make you look that happy.”

“You make me happy!” Kili protested with a scowl, brows drawing together.

Fili ran a thumb over Kili’s cheekbone. “I could spend forever trying to make you smile like that.”

Kili grabbed Fili’s hand and moved, hovering over him and glaring at him. “It wasn’t real. The smile, the feelings, the kiss, none of it was real. It happened but it wasn’t me.”

Fili reached up and traced his fingers over Kili’s mouth. “Real or not, you looked so happy.”

“You want me happy?” Kili asked, nipping Fili’s fingers. “Then put that smile on my face. Prove to me that nothing’s changed.”

Fili hesitated. “Kili.”

Kili smirked. “Yes, Fee, that’s a challenge. It’s bothering you so much so, fix it. Prove to me that you don’t care, that I’m still yours.” Kili moved so he was straddling Fili’s hips. “Don’t you want to make sure that I remember I’m yours? Aside from a couple of kisses you haven’t touched me since Rivendell.” He dropped kisses along Fili’s hand, nibbling along his index finger.

Fili shivered slightly, watching Kili lavish attention on his finger. Kili’s eyes met his in the near dark before sucking Fili’s finger into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the pad of his finger. It couldn’t be this easy, could it? Kili was playing him, taunting him, and he wasn’t about to give in, right? Well, of course not. That would defeat everything. He was still... What was he? Angry? Hurt? He watched Kili closely, noting the little smirk, and sighed. 

Kili slide Fili’s finger out of his mouth and pressed a kiss into the palm of his hand. “You don’t want to?” he asked.

“You’re playing me,” Fili said.

“No,” Kili said, letting go of Fili’s hand. “Playing you and trying to make you jealous would be me telling you that the last person who really touched me was Tauriel and asking if you really wanted to let some flouncy elf have that pleasure.”

Fili stared at him. He knew Kili was just trying to get a rise out of him, just get him angry enough to do something, but that didn’t stop the flush of irrational anger at the memory of seeing that elf touch what was his. Fili swallowed and closed his eyes. “Kili,” he grit out.

“No,” Kili said, leaning down so their noses touched. Fili could feel Kili’s hair falling around his face, could smell the faintest memory of smoke and oranges from dinner, and tried to keep his breathing even. “You saw her. She touched me, Fee. Had her hands on my face, in my hair. It was a pretty chaste kiss that you saw but she came to see me when we were all locked up. She was pretty enamoured of me. There were other kisses, brother.”

“Shut up,” Fili whispered.

“She wanted me to stay,” Kili said. “Think she probably wanted to keep me as a pet or something. A dwarf who could use a bow well enough to keep up with an elf. Now, that’s something you don’t see every day. And while I’m not exactly a catch to most of our kind, elves seem to like it.”

“Shut up, Kili.”

“Who knows what she might have done to me if Bilbo hadn’t gotten us out,” Kili said. He sat up, running his hands over Fili’s shirt-clad chest. “It wouldn’t have mattered to me, probably. There was something in that place; I hardly remembered my own name, let alone that you’re the only one for me. Who knows if I would have remembered you? You know elves and their magic. They can make anyone think and feel things.”

“Kili,” Fili warned, opening his eyes. Kili was watching him with narrowed eyes. Fili knew he was being played, that Kili was purposely pushing every single button he knew to make him react, but it was a thought that was being quickly drowned out by anger and desperate possessiveness. 

“It would have gone beyond kisses, Fili, and you know it,” Kili said idly. The narrowing of Kili’s eyes had vanished into a thoughtful look, a tiny frown on his face. “Part of me wonders how that would have gone. Would she have made me like it? Would I have shouted your name, or her’s?”

"Stop it," Fili said, eyes widening at Kili's words.

“Can you see it, Fili? Would she have had me on my back, or between her legs? She was so tall, it would have been awkward, but she probably would have made it work,” Kili said. “She probably would have had me on my back, riding m--”

Fili’s hand flashed out without him thinking about it, smacking Kili across the face with more force than he’d ever used with him before. Kili’s head snapped to the side, his hand going up to touch his split lip. Kili looked down at him, letting his hand fall to Fili’s chest as he licked the blood from the cut.

“She would have ridden me like a prized stallion,” Kili said, eyes glittering in the candlelight. Fili saw the challenge in them and swallowed. His hand itched. “It would have been all about her, you know? Maybe, maybe she would have let me come. Maybe even inside her. Magic or not I probably could have gotten her with child.” Fili’s hand flashed out, smacking Kili again. Kili licked his lips. “I’d be too blind to see anything but her, think of only her. Tauriel.”

Fili growled, smacking Kili again. “Don’t say her name.”

“Tauriel,” Kili said, drawing out the sound of the elf’s name.

Fili pushed Kili off him and got out of the bed. His hands were shaking. No. He couldn’t do this. He wouldn’t let Kili manipulate him like this.

“Tauriel,” Kili said again, lying sprawled on the bed. 

Fili turned away, not wanting to look at his brother. 

“Tauriel.”

Fili shook his head, hands going up to block his ears so he couldn’t hear her name anymore.

“Tauriel.”

Fili turned back to the bed, feeling slightly frantic. “Kili, shut up.”

Kili slid off the bed and stood in front of him, mouth set in a stubborn line. “Tauriel.”

“Shut up,” Fili repeated, voice barely there.

“Make me,” Kili said, jaw set. “Tauriel.”

Fili grabbed Kili by the shoulders and shook him. “Stop it. Stop talking.”

“Tauriel,” Kili said, bringing his bad hand up to curl awkwardly around Fili’s elbow.

Fili couldn’t bite back the distressed noise and shook his brother again. “Stop it. Kili, please, just stop.”

“Tauriel,” Kili said again, once more drawing out the sounds of her name. “C’mon, Fili, make me stop.”

“Kili,” Fili whispered, pulling away from him. He was trying to keep a leash on his anger but Kili wasn’t helping. Kili was licking the blood away from his split lip and watching him closely. Kili looked too much like a predator who had scented blood and weakness right now and Fili wanted nothing more than to wipe that look off his brother’s face. 

Kili took a step forward, closer to Fili, eyes glittering in the candlelight. “Tauriel.”

Fili smacked him again, Kili’s head snapping to the side from the force. Kili turned back to him, lip still bleeding, cheek so obviously red even in the near dark. Kili opened his mouth again and Fili smacked him before he could utter a word. Kili took a step closer, pressing up against Fili and wrapping his arms around Fili’s neck.

“Tauriel,” Kili whispered into Fili’s ear.

Fili grabbed him and shoved, pushing Kili against the wall. Kili’s head smacked into the stone wall from the force and looked dazed for a moment before Fili covered his body with his own, pulling Kili into a hungry, demanding kiss. Kili gasped, hands coming up to grip Fili’s biceps, as he kissed back. Fili’s tongue found the cut on Kili’s lip and he nipped it with his teeth, bringing more blood to the surface and flooding both their mouths with the coppery iron taste of blood.

“Tauriel,” Kili groaned into Fili’s mouth.

“You have the self-preservation instincts of a gnat,” Fili said, pulling away and smacking Kili again.

“It’s getting to you, isn’t it?” Kili asked with a smile, his voice far too smug for Fili’s taste.

“You bastard,” Fili said as he took hold of Kili’s shirt, pulling it open and sending buttons flying and he roughly undressed his brother.

“Mother would be so angry to hear you say that,” Kili said as he reached out to curl one of Fili’s braids around his fist.

“Mother’s not here,” Fili said, pulling his braid away from Kili.

“Tauriel,” Kili said with a smile. Fili smacked him, not even thinking about it anymore. It was becoming a knee-jerk reaction to hear that name on his brother’s lips. Kili hummed slightly, leaning back against the wall. “You going to make me stop talking, brother? I’m not going to stop unless you make me.”

Fili grabbed Kili’s jaw, hand covering his mouth and shoving his head back against the wall. Kili winced but opened his eyes to watch Fili. “You need to stop it, Kili. Stop talking.”

Kili licked Fili’s hand.

Fili grabbed him and threw him to the bed. Kili bounced slightly, watching as Fili pulled his own shirt off, not caring where it landed or in what condition. He joined Kili on the bed, kissing him roughly, demanding.

“Say my name,” FIli ordered, breaking the kiss to nibble along Kili’s jaw.

“No,” Kili groaned, baring his neck to Fili and arching against his body.

“Say it,” Fili said, grabbing Kili’s jaw and looking down at him. “Say my name.”

“Make me,” Kili challenged, reaching up to run his hands over Fili’s chest. His thumbs rubbed at Fili’s nipples teasing, just the right pressure to make him moan, but Fili wouldn’t let Kili win that easily. He grabbed his brother’s hands and pressed them to the mattress above Kili’s head. Kili smiled at that and arched up against him, grinding their groins together. “C’mon, make me yell your name.”

Fili looked around the room, trying to find something he could use to tie his brother down, and found nothing. He hadn’t spent much time in these rooms, forsaking sleep in the pursuit of bringing Erebor to its feet as quickly as possibly. These were Kili’s rooms, not his, but he knew his brother. He knew Kili liked his games, liked pushing Fili’s buttons, and he would never have started this if there wasn’t a way to finish it.

Kili strained against his hold, able to scrape his teeth against Fili’s throat and using his legs to pull Fili closer to him. “Make me,” he whispered.

“Kili,” Fili warned, pulling away from him and letting his wrists go.

Kili kept his wrists where they were, voluntarily submitting, and spread his legs for Fili as he arched his hips, making it quite clear what he wanted. “Make. Me. Say. Your. Name.”

Fili licked his lips, watching his brother closely. “You don’t know what you’re asking.”

“Yes, I do,” Kili said. He tipped his head back, keeping his eyes locked with Fili’s as he bared his throat. “Make me, lover. Make me say your name until it’s the only thing I know.”

“Absolutely no self-preservation,” Fili whispered.

“I trust you,” Kili said.

Fili groaned, leaning down and kissing Kili hungrily as his hands worked quickly to get his brother naked. He wasn’t gentle, losing his patience with the clothes and breaking the kiss to pull one of his knives from his boot and cutting Kili’s pants from him. Kili watched him, a sort of manic glee on his face, as Fili pulled the ruined fabric from his body. Fili trailed the knife up Kili's leg to the edge of his small clothes before using the sharp edge to cut through those as well.

"Say it," Fili said, setting the knife down and pushing himself off the bed. He kicked his boots off before manuevering himself out of his clothes. "Say my name, Kili."

"Not until you make me," Kili said.

“You really want me to make you?” Fili asked as he crawled back onto the bed, one hand wrapping around Kili’s cock and giving it a couple of teasing strokes.

“No, I’ve changed my mind, I’d rather be shouting some pouncy elf’s name,” Kili said with a roll of his eyes.

Fili smacked Kili again. “Don’t ever joke about that.”

Kili reached up and pulled Fili into a kiss. “So make me forget it ever happened.”

“Kili,” Fili sighed, kissing him. He let Kili push up against him, crawling into his lap as they kissed. Fili let his hand fall to Kili’s hip, thumb rubbing tiny circles into his skin as they kissed. He cupped the back of Kili’s head, letting his fingers thread through his hair. Kili moaned happily, hands coming up to run over Fili’s chest. Fili grabbed a handful of Kili’s hair and pulled, yanking his brother’s head back and away. “Say my name.”

Kili laughed as he winced. “No.”

“You’re making this harder on yourself then it really needs to be,” Fili said.

Kili squirmed in Fili’s lap. “Why don’t you start showing me how much I mean to you?”

Fili shook Kili by the hair a little harder, eyes narrowed. “I’ve always shown you what you mean to me. It’s about time that you show me what I mean to you.”

Kili let out an angry huff. “Fili, anything I could ever do you’re going to find some fault in.”

“You using her to make me crazy isn’t--”

“You ignoring me for the three months isn’t either,” Kili snapped.

Fili let go of his hair, hands settling on Kili’s hips. He felt like a bucket of cold water had been thrown on them. Even with Kili sitting naked in his lap he couldn't find it in him to stay aroused at this. “We keep screwing up, don’t we?”

“You do,” Kili said. He slumped against Fili, one hand coming up to toy with his braids, equally as wilted as Fili. “No, we both do.”

“We need to work things out, that’s what Balin said. The bonding will happen and be fine, but it’s better to work things out now than be blindsided after,” Fili said. 

“I’d rather you just fucked me into the mattress and call it a day,” Kili said. “That knife thing? Yeah, that was hot. You need to do it again.” He sighed and slid off Fili’s lap. “We’re going to do the talking thing, aren’t we?”

“I’d like to try,” Fili said as he watched Kili, admiring his grace as he always did.

Kili reached down and threw Fili’s pants to him before digging a pair of his own out of the dresser. He lit a couple of more candles and poured them both some wine. Fili dressed and sat on the bed, watching Kili move about the room.

“Why?” he asked finally, taking the goblet from Kili and setting it aside.

“Why what?” Kili asked as he took a sip of his wine. He sounded so tired, so resigned to everything. That’s not the way his brother should ever sound.

“You try so hard to make me angry, make me jealous,” Fili said, reaching out and drawing Kili close so he stood between Fili’s legs. He kept his hands on Kili’s hips, needing to hold him but wanting to see him as they talked. “Why?”

“I like it when you mark me up,” Kili said. He took another sip of wine. “It’s proof, I guess, that you actually do care.”

Fili flinched, hands tightening on Kili’s hips. “What do you mean, proof?”

“Durin’s beard, this is going to sound ridiculous,” Kili said, looking up at the ceiling. “You’re so...you. Uncle taught you all about tradition and miens and how one should act when being an heir to throne and all that crap, and that’s always you. I remember the you before that.” Kili set his wine aside and ran his fingers through Fili’s hair, picking apart his braids and setting the silver clasps next to the wine. “Before father died. You were just as wild as me. They could hardly ever get us inside or to take our lessons seriously. But then father died and you stopped. Maybe it was growing up and the age difference, or I don’t know. We stopped getting along for a time then, do you remember?”

Fili nodded, tugging Kili closer and scooting back on the bed so Kili could straddle his lap. “I remember. A lot was going on then. You didn’t get a lot of it because you were still a baby but I remember. Uncle told me once that I had to be strong for you and Ma because I was the oldest. It was time to grow up. So I did what I could. You kept wanting to play games but I couldn’t watch over you and Ma at the same time.”

“She kind of lost it for a little,” Kili said softly, resting his head against Fili’s.

“I did what I could,” Fili said again.

“You got so serious,” Kili said. “You started shoving everything down and being strong for everyone. You still do it, even with me. It drives me nuts. You’re all formal and polite and everything a king should be, even when it comes to me. Even before Erebor, aside from the bonding ceremonies and me making you crazy jealous, you never touched me more than was deemed appropriate by some long dead dwarf with nothing but etiquette in his heart in public. Behind closed doors, when we were alone, sure. But with everyone else? If we didn’t have the braids,” Kili said with a tug on Fili’s, “no one would ever know what we mean to each other.”

“You got me angry enough to mark you,” Fili said thoughtfully as it dawned on him. “So, what, the others would know? No one would know unless you took your clothes off.”

“No, but I would know,” Kili said. He shook his head. “Don’t ask me to explain. I don’t get it. The braids are just a formality, and then the consort’s circlet with be even more formality, but I needed something for me. Some sort of proof for me that can never be taken away."

Fili hesitated as his mind processed that, reaching up to run a careful thumb over Kili’s split lip. “You want something permanent?” he asked. “Something that’s just for us that no one else will see?”

“I wasn’t thinking permanent,” Kili said.

“No,” Fili said slowly. “But if you think about it, you started acting up and getting me more and more jealous when the bruises started to fade.”

Kili stared at him. “No I didn’t.”

“Yes,” Fili said with a smile. “You did. It makes sense, now that I’m looking at it.”

“Hunh,” Kili murmured, deft fingers unbraiding the bonding braids and carefully putting them back in. “Maybe something permanent would be a good thing.”

“Would it make you happy?” Fili asked. He tapped Kili’s hip, considering. “My mark, maybe, right here. We could have Dwalin help us with the ink. Mahal knows he’s got enough tattoos to know how to do them on others.”

Kili leaned back, meeting Fili’s eyes. “You’re serious.”

“You just said you need it,” Fili said. “Do you?” Kili was silent, mouth working open a couple of times before he shut it and shrugged helplessly. “You’d carry mine, I’d carry yours. I’d say rings but they’re not practical for either of us. You with the archery and me with two swords. Necklaces can be broken, the crowns are more formality than anything else... I’d say I’d do it myself with a knife but, I... I don’t think I could bring myself to hurt you like that.”

Kili gently tugged on one of Fili’s mustache braids. “No, it’s...it’s a good idea. I think it could work.”

“Would it help?” Fili asked.

Kili tapped Fili’s lips and tried to smile. “Won’t know until we do it.”

“Okay then,” FIli said, tugging Kili close enough he could kiss along his collarbone.

“And you said you didn’t know how to talk to me,” Kili said, nuzzling Fili’s hair.

“We need to relearn it, but it’s still there,” Fili said against Kili’s skin.

Kili was silent for a while, letting Fili kiss and nuzzle at his shoulders and neck. “You’re still upset about Mirkwood.”

Fili drew back with a wince. He knew they had to talk about it, about her, but he was trying to avoid it. He didn’t want to think about it, about the whole situation. If he was fair, the situation upset both of them, not just him. He knew that, intellectually, but emotionally he was a wreck over the whole thing.

“I’m upset too,” Kili offered, his bad hand shaking slightly as he laid it on Fili’s shoulder.

“You tell me why and I’ll try and tell you?” Fili offered.

“Why is it that I’m doing all the talking?” Kili asked with a roll of his eyes.

“Because you are so very good at it,” Fili said, leaning up to kiss him. “Would you rather I went first?”

“You’re upset because the blasted elf touched me and made me smile,” Kili said.

“Not exactly,” Fili said. He sighed and closed his eyes, letting his head fall to Kili’s shoulder and focused on breathing in his brother’s scent. “Yes, I’m upset she touched you. I’d love to cut off her hands for that, but that’s not the point. Yes, she made you smile. You... Kili, I’ve never seen you that happy. It was like, like you were the embodiment of joy when she kissed you. Like she was your One, not I. If, blast it, if your wanting to be marked is ridiculous, then me feeling like I was...lesser, or even wrong for keeping you from being able to reach that level of happiness is even more so.”

“Oh,” Kili said softly. Fili remained quite, staying where he was pressed against Kili’s shoulder. Kili started playing with Fili’s hair, running his fingers through it and putting in nonsensical braids that he unraveled as soon as he had finished them. “It wasn’t real, but that doesn’t mean anything to you, does it? It just makes it worse.”

Fili said nothing. It was fairly obvious that it only made the whole thing worse. Knowing that something that wasn’t real, something magic, had made Kili light up like that...it hurt more, for some reason. 

Kili sighed. “Okay, fine. You’re not going to answer questions that should be obvious. While we we in Mirkwood it, well, everything felt wrong. It felt off. The kiss, well. I might have looked happy, brother, but even remembering it I feel repulsed. She wasn’t you. I always ended the games before they got that far and it was for a good reason. Everyone else just feels wrong. I might have kissed her back but I couldn’t control myself. I’m pretty sure it was to make a point to Uncle, not you. Like Thranduil was saying that it doesn’t matter who it is, the elves can do whatever they want to whoever they want. No braids, not that they would have known what they meant anyway, but that’s why we took them out.”

Fili raised a hand to stroke Kili’s back, keeping him close. “Did she really come to you later?”

Kili rested his head against Fili’s, nosing his hair. “No. Well, once, but that was actually to apologize. I think she knew about us, somehow, and she said she was sorry for what she had done. It was her king’s order, which she must obey. She didn’t fancy kissing a dwarf, probably about as much as I wanted to kiss anyone but you.”

“Earlier...”

“You knew I was trying to play you,” Kili said. “It’s just words.”

Fili snorted and kissed Kili’s shoulder. “I wonder which of us should be the politician, brother.”

“Oh, you for sure,” Kili said, straightening. “I’m far too honest at times. You’re very good at formalities and policy and placating everyone.”

“And you hate when I do it.”

“I hate when you do it to me,” Kili corrected.

Fili sighed and straightened to kiss Kili on the lips. “We’re going to need to remind each other to stop things that annoy us.”

“Oh, so I remind you to stop being so fake with me?” Kili asked with narrowed eyes.

“And you stop manipulating me to make me angry,” Fili challenged, hand tightening on Kili’s hip.

Kili groaned and laughed softly. “We’re a mess.”

“The bond might fix things,” Fili offered. “The whole...other portion of it. It’ll be nice to know when you’re upset with me over something.”

Kili cupped Fili’s face and raised his face for a kiss. “It’ll be nice to have that, knowing and feeling you love me all the time.”

“You still want the mark,” Fili said, nipping Kili’s thumb lightly.

“Of course,” Kili said. “We’ll get Dwalin to do it after the ceremony.”

“So, we’ve worked things out, right?” Fili asked.

Kili brushed his thumbs over Fili’s cheek. “You’re not less, Fee, for not making me smile like that. You’re everything to me, but that’s magic. That’s beyond us.”

“I don’t want that to be beyond us, beyond you,” Fili said, dropping his eyes to the floor to avoid Kili’s. “You were so beautiful like that. I told you I could try forever and never make you that happy. Magic or not, it’s simple fact. I’d love to spend forever trying to make you smile like that.”

"Good news for you is that we have forever together," Kili said, lifting Fili's head to meet his eyes. "I only want you."

Fili leaned forward to kiss Kili sweetly. "Kili, son of Dis, would you do me the honor of being my bonded?"

"You're ridiculous," Kili said with a laugh. "But yes, Fili, son of Dis, I will be your bonded."

Fili smiled. "I should go tell Balin that the ceremony will be tomorrow."

"Don't we have to give them more notice?" Kili frowned.

"They've been waiting three months," Fili pointed out.

Kili slid off Fili's lap and waved him off, picking up his wine and taking a sip. "Go and then come back. You owe me three months of your time."

Fili got up and pulled on his shirt. "I love you," he said.

Kili smiled and took another sip of his wine. "Go before I change my mind about letting you leave."

:::

Fili knocked on Balin’s door before opening it when he heard the other dwarf bid him to enter. Dwalin and Balin were sitting comfortably around a table strewn with maps and a large jug of ale.

“It’s late, laddie,” Dwalin said with a stern look. “You should really think about getting some sleep.”

“I will,” Fili said. “I just had some things I need to discuss with you.”

“Erebor will keep til the morn,” Balin said.

“It’s about me and Kili, actually,” Fili said. He smiled as the two brother sat up straighter. “Do you think we could do the ceremony tomorrow?”

Balin arched an eyebrow at him while Dwalin hid his snickers in his beard. “It’s already tomorrow, lad,” he said. “We could do it today, aye, but then you’d have some political fall out. You should invite the elves, the men, and our kin from the Iron Hills.”

Fili nodded, “You’re right, I should. But it’s not for them, or anyone else. Kili and I have been bonded for years, this is just the last step.”

“And making him officially the consort,” Balin said. “It is a political event, even you two aside.”

Fili stood there for a moment, thinking. Dwalin was watching him with a fond look while Balin tried to be stern. It was actually quite amusing to see the two switch demeanours for once. “The problem lies in the formality of making him consort, right?”

“Aye,” Balin said.

“Then we’ll not do that til the others arrive,” Fili said. “We’ll do the rest of the bonding and then officially make him consort later. You don’t have to do both of them at once, it’s just usually done that way. So far, with how we’ve been lately, the usuals don’t really apply. No one can find fault if we’re still giving a polite nod to how things used to be.”

“So the two of you have worked everything out?” Dwalin asked while Balin stroked his beard thoughtfully.

“I think so,” Fili said. “I also have a favor to ask you, Dwalin. You know how to tattoo others, right?”

“You want me to ink the two of you?” Dwalin asked. At Fili’s nod he chuckled. “So you finally figured out your brother’s game, eh?”

Fili crossed his arms against his chest. Had it really been that obvious to everyone but him what Kili had been up to? “I’m not even going to ask how you figured that one out.”

“Thorin figured it out,” Dwalin said.

“I wish he had told me,” Fili said, letting his arms drop to his sides. “It would have spared us all a lot of grief.”

“It wasn’t anyone’s place,” Dwalin said.

“The two of you are sure you want this?” Balin asked.

Fili nodded. “Of course we want it.”

“We’ll make it work, then,” Balin said. “We’ll hold the bonding in private, just a small gathering, and have the rest of the ceremony and the formalities when we can get the delegations here.”

“I think that would be best,” Fili said. “Kili’s not really...fond of formalities.”

“I bet he isn’t,” Dwalin muttered into his beard. Fili bit his lip, looking down at the floor and clasping his hands behind his back. It seemed that Thorin had shared a lot about him and Kili with Dwalin and Fili wasn’t quite sure how he felt about that.

“Not many are, brother,” Balin said. “I’ll arrange everything. It would be best to do it later in the day, I think.”

“I’ll leave you to it then,” Fili said.

Balin shook his head and waved Fili off. “Go back to Kili. I’m sure he’s wanting to spend some time with you.”

Fili flushed at the implication that he’d been avoiding Kili and left with a quick bow. He made it back to their rooms without running into anyone else, not surprising now that he knew how late it was, and breathed a sigh of relief as he closed their door. Kili had doused some of the candles but was still awake. He was sitting at the desk and fletching some of his arrows.

“Well?” Kili asked as he got up and came over to wrap his arms around Fili.

“Later today,” Fili said as he pulled his brother close and kissed him gently. “Formality free. We’ll save all that for another time.”

“So it’ll just be us?” Kili asked.

“Us and Balin, probably Dwalin and the rest of the company,” Fili said.

“Did Dwalin...?”

“He agreed,” Fili said, pushing Kili’s hair over his shoulder and kissed his neck.

Kili pulled away and, with a smile, led Fili to the bed. “Then everything is settled. You, in the meantime, have three months to make up to me.”

Fili let himself be pushed down onto the bed as Kili crawled over him. “Three months? I think I can do that.”

“You,” Kili said, nose-to-nose with Fili, “are going to owe it to me for a very long time.”

Fili smiled and pulled Kili in for a sweet kiss. “I don’t see a problem with that.”

:::

The bonding ceremony was held deep in Erebor, deep enough that the stones sung to all in attendance. Balin presided, speaking for Thorin with all the authority that he held in trust, talking Fili and Kili through the ritual. The company stood as witnesses, all of them full of smiles and relief that the two of them had worked things out.

After the promises and vows had been spoken, Kili and Fili holding their hands tight together, bound in mithril ribbon, a blindingly bright light shone around them. They heard a voice in Khuzdul whispering blessings upon them as the light began to fade.

Fili couldn’t remember a single word of what was said to him as he turned to look at Kili, a brilliant smile on his face. Fili felt his heart stop for a moment as he watched his brother. He knew now that the smile in Mirkwood had been false because it had been missing something, been missing a vital part of Kili. He knew because the smile Kili had on his face now was full of love and warmth and so much joy that Fili could do nothing more than pull him close in a kiss.

“I make you happy,” Fili said, cupping Kili’s face and watching that smile spread across his face again.

“Of course you do, you stupid idiot,” Kili said fondly. “Of course you do.”

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so. Uhm. Yeah. NEXT UP, consort stuff.
> 
> By the way, the two of them are impossible. Jeez. **pokes them with sharp sticks**


End file.
